Falling in Love (Part 2): Just Ask!

I’m surprised how many managers think they must figure out – all by themselves – what their direct reports need from them.  They believe they should be mind readers or just super intuitive.  But it’s really so much easier.  

All you have to do is ask!

I’ve also noticed that sometimes managers don’t inquire because they believe it obligates them to do everything that’s asked of them.  Not so.  If you’re clear that you can’t promise to do it all and you say what you can do, nothing should stop you from asking!

And if all you ask is the simple question “what do you need from me,” you’re on the right track.

But why stop there?   I’m sure there are lots of specific things you’d like to know.

I polled managers and colleagues for questions they use and like … ones that get them good information about how people want to be treated at work and what they need.  Here’s what I heard, in two general categories.  

Which ones will you try?

Overall Questions
– What is going well/not well for you in your role?
– What do you expect from me as your manager?
– What do you appreciate/not appreciate about my management style?
– What did you like about the best manager you ever had?
– What motivates you in your current role?  
– What makes you enthusiastic about work overall?
– What are your “hot buttons?” (i.e., things that upset you)
– What do you want me to do more of/less of/the same?

Specific Questions
– How do you like to receive feedback?
– What’s the best way to communicate with you?
– When you’ve done something great, what’s the best way to show my appreciation?
– How often would you like to meet with me?
– What kind of information do you need from me?  In what format? How often?
– How can I support your development – in this role and beyond?